I wish I was… blogging

The past couple of years have been so busy. Lots of things have happened in my life but this morning, while lying in bed with my baby before waking to cook breakfast and get my older boys to school, I received a comment that seemed like it was out of the blue if only because I have been too busy for blogging lately. This was the comment.

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If you are just now catching up and wondering what or who this refers to, watch this video about baby Indiana Delahunty.

Things like this comment just really get to me. I am so fortunate for my healthy children, and things could have turned into a real tragedy in my life if I had continued down the path of psychiatry 9 years ago. It’s hard to believe it’s been 9 years. But even harder is knowing that there are children out there suffering for the same reasons that I started on that path in the first place. Which is to say, basically no reason whatsoever. I was drugged by my OB/GYN for NO reason whatsoever. In summary, that’s all it was. There was nothing requiring intervention. When your kid runs out in front of a car and almost gets hit, it’s normal to freak out. If your baby nearly dies at two days old, it’s normal to freak out. Even a panic attack would be ok. People do “get over” these things. People don’t need drugs to do it.

If psychotropic drugs were as safe as the candy they seem to be treated like, then go ahead, take your psychiatric drugs. But when there are umpteen million lawsuits for dead babies, suicides, murders, and even criminal defense attorneys employing the “Zoloft defense” – do you really think it’s worth it? Go get some counseling, get some “alternative” healing, anything that isn’t the chemical equivalent of taking LSD, PCP, meth or cocaine.

So what would you never get over? I guarantee you, if your baby dies in utero, you will never get over it. If you have to watch your newborn baby die in the ICU from a preventable side effect of Effexor that you didn’t need to take, you will never get over it. If your child hangs herself in the school bathroom, you will NEVER get over it.

During the past two years I’ve felt as though I have run out of things to say about psychiatric drugs. But messages like this one make it clear to me that I must keep going.

When I reread Indi’s story this morning, and the comments on the blog, I couldn’t help but think to myself that this is so important. Just a few comments up from the one that kept me awake at 5 am, is a post from a mother who lost her baby in the 90s while pregnant on Effexor.

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And another writes of a miscarriage at 11 weeks.

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If you’re already an activist, please don’t stop. If you’re just a parent reading this blog wondering what is going on, please start doing your research. Spare your family the sorrow that too many others know.

There are many days when I see what my friends are doing and I wonder, why can’t I be doing that? I’d much rather be on a ski trip or going to that concert, or taking a vacation, than doing what I am doing. But waking up at 4:45 am to a message like that makes me think, I’d rather be blogging.

– Amy James

2 thoughts on “I wish I was… blogging

  1. I am glad you are blogging. My fire for online activism has come and gone over these past eight years, mostly depending on how much blowback ensues. Sometimes it is good to take a break to recharge your batteries.

    I am determined to continue on despite bouts of illness and weariness that can be all consuming.

    Send me my login and password and we can clink arms once again to jump back in and try to save a few babies!

    Love, Jen

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